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mother may i

Graphic by Jess Underwood

she ties a bow in her smock
and throws the meat in the
                       green and
                       white
                       cracked porcelain sink
bastes stock into the envelope of guts
                       hoping they dont all spill out
                       and reveal her secrets
the kids gargle
sparkling grape juice
                       she can’t help
                       but carry them everywhere

she will serve it to her
husband and children
but is thinking about some
                                  (one)
                       thing
                       else
                                  her lover
                       whispers
                       on the phone late
                       at night

a paranoid walking
                       over
to the oven
in the marital home
                       hoping her daughter doesn’t
                       follow
                       in her footsteps

but she trips over the
root memory
                       being ogled
                       by men with whiskey
                       on their breath
                       (who
                       raid the kitchen
                       of woman’s bodies)

The husband chews the fat

she smokes to
try and forget
                      what her own mother
                                             taught her about love